Ask the Captain...
Dear Captain: My wife and I really enjoy having our family over to our house for special occasions and holidays. This past Thanksgiving, my wife cooked the bird for nearly 35 relatives. On almost every occasion such as this, I entertain our guests with a tour of my "hatatorium" where I lecture on the various authentic baseball caps in my collection and the logos. My wife says that I go on too long and people lose interest...but that's not the point.
The reason that I am writing this is because I have noticed that one of my prized caps went missing shortly after the Thanksgiving day visit. My wife and I were about to create this year's Christmas cards and we wanted to be photographed wearing the Harrisburg Senators "Christmas in July" cap that was worn in the summer of 2017 (designed by Anthony Collicchio). I had kept this prized cap in the Minor League section of the "hatatorium", (alphabetized and in chronological order), in it's own display case.
It makes me sick to think that one of my own family members would have taken this cap, but we have no idea what else could have happened to it. We have asked our children and grandchildren whether they saw anyone removing caps from the display cases, but they say they saw no one. Nothing else in the hatatorium was disturbed. We are at a loss as to what to do. Should we cancel our Christmas meal? Should we ignore this and pick another cap for our Christmas cards?
The Captain's Response: After considerable thought, you should absolutely send a family Christmas card this year. Here is what I suggest that you send:
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